// Tough Economic Times//

  • My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.


  • Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.


  • CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.


  • Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.


  • If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.


  • McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.


  • Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.


  • My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!


  • A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.


  • A picture is now only worth 200 words. 


  • And, finally….


  • I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck